Ready to Mingle

OK, enough with the heavy posts of late...

So I've been waiting (not so patiently) to get back on the horse...

But here are a few problems:

1.  I'm EXTREMELY picky
2.  I live in the suburbs
3.  I'm a dating novice

Possible solutions:
1.  Don't be picky about first dates.  Be picky by the 3rd date (max).
2.  Get out of there!  Go to the city as often as possible.
3.  Seek advice from the more experienced.

So what are ways to meet guys?

I once asked a 65 year old woman this question, and she suggested wine tasting parties.  Chances are you'll meet someone with class, taste and money!

An anonymous friend's version of a list of ways:

• Salsa/tango lessons - a guy with rhythm, always a plus (but then most ballroom dance classes usually have a short supply of guys - not to mention straight ones) 
• Soccer/Rugby matches - guy will probably be athletic
• Social sports clubs (like Zogsports in NYC) - they usually have happy hours for all the teams afterward
• Rock Climbing
• Photography class
• Cooking class - a man who takes charge in the kitchen? be still my heart! (and stomach)
• Museum Functions - some museums have social clubs that organize social outings centered around new exhibits
• Coffee shops - Baristas are people too!
• Political Rallies - Occupy Wall Street - share a tent!
• Wine Tastings / Beer Gardens - But just like bars and clubs, this is a high risk scene
• Apartment/house parties - usually very casual and light

I don't think I'm quite ready to try out dating websites.

Another option is being set up on blind dates.  It is pretty key to have someone vouch for a guy's personality...so I am allowing myself to be set up.  This is new territory for me.  Any advice?

One thing is for sure:  I am ready to mingle.

The High Road

Birthdays.

Birthdays are like our own personal "New Year's".  Though I feel I am always constantly evaluating my life, this day I pause to think if I'm turning out to be the person I've always wanted to be - a person that I can be proud of.

Returning home from abroad has been just as eye-opening as living abroad.  Old wounds were reopened, new problems arose.

I had lunch with my uncle yesterday, and he was telling me a story about his kids. His two daughters were having a full on cat fight - saying hurtful things and pulling hair.  But their brother intervened and said - "Look, guys, you're sisters.  At some point, someone has to take the high road."

I've been thinking about this high road...the path least often traveled.  The path that subjects us to pain and rejection.  Yet it's the path toward healing.

Living with family has admittedly strained my relationships with certain family members.  And for the whole time it has been going on, there has just been this one dark cloud following me around...

And this year, my new year...I have made the decision to make it go away.

You want things to change?  Start with yourself.  Start with the things you can control.  Take the lead, and if others really care...they will follow or come around eventually.

I have my pride, and in the past I would rather ignore my issues and hope they go away...but I know if I really do care about it...it eats away at me.  

Today, I wrote an email to friends I had fallen out of touch with.  It was hard to write, but I wanted to say sorry.  There's a good chance I won't get a response, but I thought about whether it was worth the risk of getting hurt to put myself out there - and I decided, yes.  It was worth it.

Today, I will make peace with my family.  And be more understanding.  There's always another side to the story.

Just like every relationship, whether romantic, familial or purely friendly, the most important thing is that you tried.  You tried to make amends, you tried to make it work.  And if it doesn't work out, at least you know you tried!

Life is too short.

So today, I take the high road.

Signs

When you're looking for signs, sometimes you find them.

This month has been especially rough, and today I needed a little reminder.  I found it in the photo below.  Life is what you make of it, and you alone are the sole master of your own happiness.

I will keep looking for signs...and I will keep searching for inspiration to pull myself out of life's little pot holes.